Thursday, July 30, 2009


This year, my New Year's self-reflective ponderings ended with the basic question: "Yeah, but what really matters?"


...very quick answer...what matters is a condition? I consider the experiences of relationships, personal growth, artistic discovery, work, physical indulgences, etc. , and realize the quality of 'vibrancy' IS crucial. It's not always apparent, but it is something I value.

Now here I am in the icebox of February, senses dull and muddy, it's a struggle to stay alert. I wander through days, then weeks. I meander through paintings, never completing them, just making endless revisions.

February is a month of missing time and forfeiture of will, and so, if one is an alien abductee practicing meditation, it may well be a time for vibrant living. Have at it.

* My first Rocktown post, from the deleted first year, re-created from a recently discovered folder of copies.


Nomi Lubin said...

Wow, you deleted your whole first year?

Vibrancy. Yes, agree.

This is very well written.

February is a month of missing time and forfeiture of will.

Carla said...

Thanks Nomi. I was in a funk and deleting the blog satisfied whatever melodrama I needed to display. Relatively harmless too, as annihilations go.

I plan on re-creating some posts from what I found, and will probably add or change them.

M.A.H. said...

I have a few old posts still in draft mode. Usually they're rants, but sometimes I'll post them with the original date, figuring no one will see them. :) Look forward to reading what goes for melodrama in someone else's world.

Carla said...

I never thought about posting old drafts and letting them appear in the past. I wonder if they will pop up on search engines though. Interesting.

Carla said...

It seems a bit like undressing in front of a window where you know no one will pass by, but still, it's and open window and you're technically exposing your goodies.